LEARNING TO INTER-BE
the great buddhist master and teacher thich nhat hanh offers the word interbeing to describe the reality of our interconnectivity and inter-dependence buried under the weight of our pettiness and easily stoked grievances. meditations that expand our capacity to inter-be can replace our disconnect and discontent with wisdom and compassion for ourselves and others.
as disruptive technologies such as social media and generative AI gain momentum repairing our disconnect and restoring trust in each other becomes an even higher priority. if human beings are to thrive we must all thrive together. the three distinct buddhist meditation practices below can help us lay the groundwork for our collective blossoming.
we belong to each other; we cannot cut reality into pieces.
thich nhat hanh
metta loving kindness
in metta we choose to concentrate loving kindness on a particular object with great focus and sincerity. the script for this meditation has been adapted from sharon salzburg lovingkindness.
the meditation
the beginning
we begin by sending loving kindness to ourselves with words such as: may I be happy, may I be safe, may I be healthy, may I live with ease... as we repeat these words we open ourselves to receiving the blessing and allow ourselves to feel them deeply and with sincerity.
the practice
we then send loving kindness to some one we love, some one we feel neutral towards and someone who causes us great distress. we repeat the same phrases regardless for each as we imagine the being in front of us: may they be happy, may they be safe, may they be healthy, may they live with ease. from here we extend loving kindness towards all beings everywhere in acknowledgement of our connection and capacity for love. in the expansion of loving kindness it becomes increasingly difficult to stay with our intention and our mind can wander. when that happens gently bring your attention back to the chosen object and wish it well without reserve... that is the practice.
the mindshift
there is a realization that all beings desire to be happy. there is also a deeper understanding of our shared vulnerability. the practice asks that we send loving kindness to all beings without reserve or judgement so that the practice becomes one of inclusion and compassion for ourself and others.
tonglen
tonglen practice requires that we take in another being's pain and transform it with our own capacity for compassion. this meditation has been adapted from pema chodron how to practice tonglen, published in the lion's roar magazine, jan 2023.
the meditation
the beginning
we begin by sitting upright and resting our mind so we can be open to receiving the wisdom of the practice. with intention we make darkness palpable by manifesting it as heat darkness and heaviness and breathing it in. with the same intensity of intention we breathe out light coolness and compassion to replace it. we repeat this process until our negative and positive energies are synchronized with our breath.
the practice
we then bring to mind a person who may be in pain and need release from it. we take in that person's pain with our in-breath and send them positive energy with our out-breath. in the exchange the darkness does not take residence in us. to the contrary, it is transformed by our compassion into something healing and comforting. we can then extend this practice to all who may be in pain and suffering in a similar way including ourselves.
the mindshift
as we extend tonglen exponentially our capacity for compassion for ourselves and towards others naturally expands. we are able to acknowledge our own pain and honor it and also feel the pain of others.
three touchings of the earth
this meditation addresses our sense of isolation and gives proof that it is an illusion. the script has been adapted from thich nhat hanh's text for the plum village meditation center. instead of a series of prostrations we recommend that you lay comfortably on your mat and use visualization to achieve the same objective.
the meditation
the beginning
we begin on our mats lying on our bellies with our forehead touching the ground and arms extended outwards in an expression of expansion and reach.
the practice
we bring to mind our immediate family. we visualize each face in its particularity so we can remember it. we invoke each name in order of our mothers fathers sisters brothers cousins aunts uncles grandparent and great grandparents. we then continue the regression generationally as far back as we can go to connect with our ancestors. once complete we can then invoke our next circle of familiarity and extend our thoughts to our close friends-listeners-teachers-coaches and anyone else who may have helped us in our daily life. we can extend ourselves in this way towards the flora and fauna in our gardens-neighborhoods-forest-country- continent-world and universe till we feel a sense of connection in our bones.
the mindshift
each circle of connection expands our reach towards the infinite and embeds the sense of inter-being deeply into our bodies. the practice helps cultivates our compassion and deepens our connection with other beings.
